Session transcript

The Swamp: Moving Grief and Rage, and Coming Back to You

with Liz Reichard · Day 5 · The Polite One

Collect all this old energy. Collect all this gold energy. Mix it. Turn it up. Fill up.

Welcome, welcome, welcome. My name is Liz. I'm a Radiance Coach and a Qoya teacher, and for about ten years I was a lawyer, working predominantly in family law. I'm based in Australia, in Victoria, about an hour out of Melbourne in the beautiful Macedon Ranges. So I've got country and the city, a nice little balance.

Through my work, I help women remember the glory, the radiance, the wonderful human they already are, the one who has always been there, before society and everyone else (parents, teachers, bosses, spouses, the media) told us what we were supposed to be like and how we were supposed to show up as women in this world. What I do is help women strip all that shit back and come back to themselves. Because I strongly believe that women are not broken. You might be a little bit dented. You might be a little bit stretched. But you are a whole-ass human, and all you need to do is start stripping back those layers of bullshit.

Haven't you been given a lot of messages about what you're supposed to look like, how you're supposed to act, how you're supposed to dress, what you're supposed to do with your life? White picket fence and 2.4 kids, anyone? So that's my work and what I do. I'm also very much a body image activist. I help women strip back the bullshit they've been told about their bodies, that their body is the most important thing about them. It's not. It's your mind. It's your heart. What you love, what you hate. That's what's important, not the message you've always been sold.

But that's enough about me. Let's talk about why we're here today. I'm here to introduce you to the Swamp, and I'm also going to guide you through a Swamp, with some slides and music, so you can actually follow along. There will also be a factsheet with a link to a playlist, so you can do the Swamp again later. I don't want to give you this tool in this presentation and then have you not remember how to do it. I want to give it to you so you can use it and share it. I can't work with every woman on the planet, but if each woman I work with takes the work and spreads it to her circle, her sisters, her friends, her colleagues, then the work ripples out, and that brings us all closer together.

So what's the Swamp? The Swamp is an embodiment practice. Embodiment just means that we stop thinking about what's going on, and we start feeling it in our bodies and moving with that feeling, however that feeling needs to move in your body. I know for some of you that might seem like a really odd thing, and I invite you to play with it: to stop the thinking and start listening to what your body is saying, because she has so, so much wisdom. If you can start to get out of your head and into your body, things will shift for you. Things will change.

The Swamp is designed to help you acknowledge, feel, and then release some of your emotions. It starts with rage, or anger, or whatever you want to call it. So often as women, we stifle our rage. We're told we're not allowed to get angry. "Why are you angry? What's wrong with you?" And if you're a woman of colour, there's an extra layer to how you're allowed to express anger and what that means. So the Swamp is an opportunity for you to let yourself feel it. To acknowledge it, have it there, and say, "Okay, what does it feel like? Where is it in my body, and how do I need to move with it? Do I need to punch the air? Do I need to take a cushion and smack it against the chair?" I knew one woman who liked smashing yoga blocks because they made a really satisfying sound. Do I need to throw myself on the floor and have a tantrum like a two-year-old? Do I need to jump, or stamp my feet? Whatever you need to do is right. So that's the first song.

From that song, we transition into the next, which is grief. Again, that's an emotion women are told how we're allowed to express. And often, underneath the anger is grief. So we transition from the rage into the grief, and again, you let yourself feel it and move with it the way you need to. If that means you need to curl up in a ball and cry your heart out, then that's what you do. There is no wrong way to do it. The way you do it will always be the right way. You just move with the grief, whatever that needs to look like and however that needs to feel.

And then, because I don't want to leave you there in the anger and the grief, I want you to come back to yourself: come back to your radiance, your turn-on, your lit-up self. So we finish with a sexy, sensual song to bring you back to your radiance. Touch your arms, love your neck, your chest. If you want to go a little further, it's your body; you get to touch her how you want. Move your hips in circles, side to side, and really feel into it: what does it feel like to move my body just for me, sensual and slow?

You can Swamp on an interaction with someone that made you feel really uncomfortable or angry, or where you're not sure what the emotion is. You can Swamp on bigger things, like the way you've been treated by people in general, or on one specific thing. You can Swamp on the way women are treated in the world. You can Swamp on something in the news that's really upsetting you. You get to make it your own, in the way that works for you.

So now I'm going to guide you through the Swamp, with some slides up to walk you through the process.

Getting ready to Swamp: before you start, find yourself a private space where you won't be disturbed. You might like to have some cushions or pillows to punch. Think about what is upsetting you, and why. You could write it down, or say it out loud.

In a moment, I'll play the rage song. During the song, I invite you to let the rage flow through your body. Punch your pillow, or hit it against the chair or your bed. Scream, throw a tantrum like a two-year-old. Do whatever feels right to move the anger through your body.

[The rage song plays.]

Take a moment here to acknowledge what came up for you during that song. You might like to close your eyes and slow your body down. Acknowledge it, listen, and know that it is all absolutely, perfectly normal to have these feelings, and to feel the way you do right now.

Now we're going to transition to grief. Allow the feeling of grief to move through your body. It doesn't matter how much you move, as long as you move in some way. Allow yourself to feel it all, in whatever way it comes up for you. It will always be the right way.

[The grief song plays.]

Take a moment here to acknowledge what came up for you. Now bring yourself back to your radiance. Move your hips. Run your hands over your body. Bring yourself back to the light, back to your brilliant inner radiance.

[The radiance song plays.]

Afterwards: if, once you've completed the Swamp, you're still feeling tender, I invite you to play a song you love and dance to it to bring you back to your truth. Use the Swamp as often as you like. You can Swamp on any topic or issue. You might like to Swamp after a fight or a nasty interaction with another person, or after a lousy day.

So, beauty, how do you feel after the Swamp? If you've got any questions, or anything comes up and you want to talk to me, my details are under this video. Send me a message on Instagram or send me an email. I'd love to help you sort out anything that came up in the Swamp.

I've also got a freebie for you: an electronic version of my Desire Journal. It's got prompts in it to help you work out what you actually want. As women, we so often have no idea, because we've never been asked, and we've never taken the time to actually think about it. It talks about the difference between desires and goals, and then gives you prompts for different areas of your life to get the juices flowing and get you thinking, and hopefully that will start to snowball. So that's there for you as well.

Thank you for listening to my presentation. I truly, truly appreciate you. I know there's a lot going on in this summit, and I'm truly honoured that you spent the time to listen to me and, hopefully, to participate in this one. So thank you.